Ritual

fear
anger
exploring
excitment
crying
dancing
supporting
touching
open
bonding

We entered to the dark room one by one. We were all sitting in a circle and each one of us had a candle. We could hear only the drums. In some point we were asked to lay down and close our eyes..

The drums got louder and louder, and we were asked to do things like "put our mask of anger" or "think about something happy" and share it with a partner. It was wierd for me... I really wanted to get into the mood, and I really tried to think only about the thing that I was asked to, but for some reason I couldn't. In some point we had to share our feeling with a partner. I felt bad because I didn't feel that I "feel like I'm suppose to feel", but later I understood that there is not such thing as "suppose to feel". In the minute when I touched my partner, my feelings started growing. I felt the exact same feeling which I felt during my bad experience, exactly the same anger, exactly the same happiness.

I thought that it would be hard for me, sharing my feeling with my partner but than I realized why I was there and why were they there, and that I had nothing to be ashamed of. It made me feel free to show what I felt.

It was a really special experience for me, because I felt that we now crossed a barrier that we had- we all had to think about a really bad experience that we had, and get over it with each other.. I felt that I have a group that supports me.